Sundown [Attn: Jenn/Zeen]
Posted: December 23rd, 2016, 2:27 am
Saowynn
Don’t tense up, she told herself. That only makes it hurt worse. But knowledge that the pain was coming tightened every muscle in her body. She whimpered in anticipation, sweat pouring down her face. Only a soft whoosh gave her warning before the whip lashed across her back. A scream ripped out of her as pain weakened her knees. She cried into her shoulder as she hung in limp agony. Then arms wrapped around her, squeezing her, choking her. She thrashed and kicked and…
...fluttered awake, still thrashing and crying out, her hands clawing at the arms around her. Those arms tightened as their owner pressed his lips against her hair, voice trying to soothe and calm her. As she became more conscious, she ceased struggling. Her breath continued in ragged gasps for several minutes, though, as the nightmare lingered. Though her back had no scars to remind her where it has been kissed by a whip, her mind would not let her forget it.
Then again, neither did the presence of the man who held her. Jahn had, after all, been the man wielding the whip. She knew he could feel her conflicted emotions just as she could feel his. When she slept, she had no way of shutting him out, so when her nightmares returned he knew. He never complained, though, no matter how tired he grew. He continued holding her until her heart rate returned to normal and she grew still. Without a word, he let her go and slid out of bed.
Saowynn slid around so her legs dangled off the edge of the bed, scrubbing her hands through the tangled black mess of her hair. She had been back at the Tower for a month now, and more nights than not her sleep was disturbed. And it was making her...numb. Hollow. A shell. It was a feeling she was not accustomed to, as if the ends of her nerves had been burned off. Even when Jace had died and she was overwhelmed with pain, she felt something. Not feeling anything...it terrified her.
She jumped slightly when Jahn returned to the room. His eyes had dark circles under them, as well, making their green nearly black, and she sensed his exhaustion. A piece of her, maybe even most of her, felt bad for all of this, but part didn’t. He had agreed with her brother that she didn’t need to know the plan that had been executed in Arad Doman, and had allowed her to be tortured in an effort to stop the Whitecloaks. In his hand he held a glass filled with what looked like water. “Drink this,” he said, holding it out to her.
She gave him a long look, clearly not wanting to take it. The last time she’d accepted a drink from him, it had been laced with forkroot. His face flushed with a mix of shame and anger but his outstretched arm didn’t budge. The Green took the glass and sniffed at it with uncertainty. “It’ll help you sleep undisturbed,” Jahn sighed, his gruff voice displeased that he had to explain himself. She took a sip after sniffing the glass’s contents and found no hint of mint to the concoction. So she knocked back the bitter drink and handed him back the empty glass. He sit it down on her night table, folded her back under her sheets and pulled the covers back up to her chin. She was barely aware of him kissing her forehead before her eyes fluttered closed and a deep, dreamless sleep found her.
Some time later, she became aware of someone shaking her gently. Her gummy eyes eventually opened and found Jahn standing over her. “Wha...what is it?” she muttered, her speech a little slurry from whatever he’d given her. Her eyes cut to the window and noted that it had to be a couple of hours past midday. Light, she felt groggy!
“The M’Hael - Zarius...he wants to see you.” Now it was his turn to look concerned. His leaving the Tower hadn’t been mutual and there had been a great deal of discussion about what to do with him since they had come back to Hama Valon. Saowynn assumed this discussion would fall in line with that conversation. Given the knot of worry that she felt in his mind, he didn’t know but suspected as much, too.
He held out his hand and helped her out of bed, which she didn’t want but found she needed when she wobbled on her feet. A wave of dizziness swept through her but eventually left her standing upright. “Please tell the M’Hael I will be there shortly. I’d like to freshen up first.”
The Green managed to wash off and change into fresh clothing. Though titles didn’t mean much to her, she felt it might be better for Jahn if she took this meeting seriously. She might not fully trust him - maybe she never would - but he did do what he could to keep her safe when she was Goodwind’s captive, even if that meant taking charge of her torment. She was no stranger to Tower punishments herself, having been sent to a farm more than once as a full sister, but here she wasn’t sure what to expect. Therefore she dressed in a formal Domani dress in a deep purple, to which she added her Great Serpent ring, green-fringed shawl and some tasteful powders and paints. She left her hair loose, and it curled around her face with a cheer she didn’t feel.
Finally, she found Jahn in her foyer and said, “Let’s go see the M’Hael.”
...fluttered awake, still thrashing and crying out, her hands clawing at the arms around her. Those arms tightened as their owner pressed his lips against her hair, voice trying to soothe and calm her. As she became more conscious, she ceased struggling. Her breath continued in ragged gasps for several minutes, though, as the nightmare lingered. Though her back had no scars to remind her where it has been kissed by a whip, her mind would not let her forget it.
Then again, neither did the presence of the man who held her. Jahn had, after all, been the man wielding the whip. She knew he could feel her conflicted emotions just as she could feel his. When she slept, she had no way of shutting him out, so when her nightmares returned he knew. He never complained, though, no matter how tired he grew. He continued holding her until her heart rate returned to normal and she grew still. Without a word, he let her go and slid out of bed.
Saowynn slid around so her legs dangled off the edge of the bed, scrubbing her hands through the tangled black mess of her hair. She had been back at the Tower for a month now, and more nights than not her sleep was disturbed. And it was making her...numb. Hollow. A shell. It was a feeling she was not accustomed to, as if the ends of her nerves had been burned off. Even when Jace had died and she was overwhelmed with pain, she felt something. Not feeling anything...it terrified her.
She jumped slightly when Jahn returned to the room. His eyes had dark circles under them, as well, making their green nearly black, and she sensed his exhaustion. A piece of her, maybe even most of her, felt bad for all of this, but part didn’t. He had agreed with her brother that she didn’t need to know the plan that had been executed in Arad Doman, and had allowed her to be tortured in an effort to stop the Whitecloaks. In his hand he held a glass filled with what looked like water. “Drink this,” he said, holding it out to her.
She gave him a long look, clearly not wanting to take it. The last time she’d accepted a drink from him, it had been laced with forkroot. His face flushed with a mix of shame and anger but his outstretched arm didn’t budge. The Green took the glass and sniffed at it with uncertainty. “It’ll help you sleep undisturbed,” Jahn sighed, his gruff voice displeased that he had to explain himself. She took a sip after sniffing the glass’s contents and found no hint of mint to the concoction. So she knocked back the bitter drink and handed him back the empty glass. He sit it down on her night table, folded her back under her sheets and pulled the covers back up to her chin. She was barely aware of him kissing her forehead before her eyes fluttered closed and a deep, dreamless sleep found her.
Some time later, she became aware of someone shaking her gently. Her gummy eyes eventually opened and found Jahn standing over her. “Wha...what is it?” she muttered, her speech a little slurry from whatever he’d given her. Her eyes cut to the window and noted that it had to be a couple of hours past midday. Light, she felt groggy!
“The M’Hael - Zarius...he wants to see you.” Now it was his turn to look concerned. His leaving the Tower hadn’t been mutual and there had been a great deal of discussion about what to do with him since they had come back to Hama Valon. Saowynn assumed this discussion would fall in line with that conversation. Given the knot of worry that she felt in his mind, he didn’t know but suspected as much, too.
He held out his hand and helped her out of bed, which she didn’t want but found she needed when she wobbled on her feet. A wave of dizziness swept through her but eventually left her standing upright. “Please tell the M’Hael I will be there shortly. I’d like to freshen up first.”
The Green managed to wash off and change into fresh clothing. Though titles didn’t mean much to her, she felt it might be better for Jahn if she took this meeting seriously. She might not fully trust him - maybe she never would - but he did do what he could to keep her safe when she was Goodwind’s captive, even if that meant taking charge of her torment. She was no stranger to Tower punishments herself, having been sent to a farm more than once as a full sister, but here she wasn’t sure what to expect. Therefore she dressed in a formal Domani dress in a deep purple, to which she added her Great Serpent ring, green-fringed shawl and some tasteful powders and paints. She left her hair loose, and it curled around her face with a cheer she didn’t feel.
Finally, she found Jahn in her foyer and said, “Let’s go see the M’Hael.”