And We, Who Are Yet Still Living [Attn: Jerid Walker Asha'man]

[Bella]

Although she had learned long ago to not lament the things that she did not now nor could she ever have, there were moments when Lysira would have given anything to be able to use her voice and speak. It was always the moments where she wished to whisper, rather than shout, because those were the moments of her heart leaving her body and wishing to sing.

If the situation called for shouting, silence was oft best placed. Other moments, other sounds worked as well. Her son had grown up responding to the clapping of her hands or the stomping of her foot when she needed to get his attention in a hurry. When in a fight, she had made her silence her dear, dear friend and more than one foe had died for camaraderie.

But no, these were the moments when she wished to speak.

The moments of intimacy in the dark when she wanted to say, I love you. Or those times when her son had been young and would curl up on her, filling her arms and still her hands, that she wanted to say, You are cherished. And now, as she danced in her husband's embrace, she wanted to tell him all the things his words brought to her mind.

Yet she had no voice, no throat with which to speak. She never had, since the day of her birth, and never would.

So instead of saying, "I remember that night, and it comforted me in my years of solitude as much as it broke my heart then too," or "In all the years that passed, I remained grateful for that moment," or "it was the best of me, until our son..." Instead of being able to put any of those words to sound, she smiled. Her dark eyes glistened with unshed tears. And she laid her head on his shoulder with enough affection to offer subtext to all she could not say aloud.

[Jack]

Jerid looked into Lysira's eyes, not needing any words from her to understand the meaning held in those large pools. Where a few unenlightened brethren had derided his decision for bonding her so many years ago when both were younger — limited had been a word used — the Indigo knew better.

Neither needed words to communicate. She grew up never knowing them and he had been a thief accustomed to silence and was well aware of the benefits of the language of hands.

But more than anything, they shared a commonality that went beyond words, signs or writing.

He kissed her head softly as she leaned it against his shoulder, and more a rare moment he forgot about all the events of the immediate past.

“As it well should be, Master Walker,” sounded a familiar voice. “But the question is … will it last? You deserve peace of mind, but this place and this path will destroy everything you've rebuilt.”

Jerid knew that voice. It was long gone, even from his dreams … from the Dream. Yet his eyes flickered toward the back of the inn.

He was there for but an instant … a slender man of his height, slightly grey hair, blue eyes peering through silver glasses and holding a wolf cane. He might pass for a merchant and held a silent but humble confidence in his stance.

And then he wasn't there.

The music ended and Jerid snapped back to reality. He looked at Lysira as the dance floor cleared and he murmured, “Let us find a table and a meal to eat.”

[Bella]

She was too well trained a warder to not recognize the change in his body. Lysira felt her husband's muscles tense and when she looked up, she saw the way his eyes moved off...but then the song ended. She hadn't even been paying attention at that point, but he spoke of a table and a meal. Whatever had happened in that moment was gone again in a flash.

Both the warder and the wife in her wanted to know more, but she also wanted to allow him peace. If he did not wish to speak of it, she would not force him. As he moved off the moment so fast, she knew it wasn't a threat.

With a faint, slightly forced, smile, she nodded and stepped out of his embrace. They found a table readily enough and took a seat. She of course let him do the ordering, and there was food and wine on their table almost instantly, or so it seemed. She wanted to lighten the mood and looked at him across the table. Before setting upon her meal, she lifted her hands to speak.

'So, I've been thinking,' she began and then paused long enough to let him wonder as her lips tilted up at the corners. 'Perhaps we should petition the Browns to let us build a room in the library. Our son spends so much time there, we might as well let him move there. What say you, my love?' Her eyes glinted with the humor she hoped to impart on him.

[Jack]

Jerid knew one thing from his wife's emotions and from her expressions that Lysira Walker always sensed when things were wrong, even if he didn't show them outwards.

His smile was brief and nearly invisible, appreciating the fact that Lys didn't push any further for information. Otherwise, she might have pulled him out of the inn at the mention of seeing signs of dead people.

It was but a trick of the light and his own mind. Or so you think, Jerid Walker.

He shoved the thought aside as they sat down. As Lysira's hands danced, his lips twitched in amusement.

“I would think it a very worthwhile endeavor. They may get the impression he might be looking toward that Ajah should he ever show signs of the ability to channel,” Jerid murmured. They had never discussed testing Cade and Jerid had long since settled on letting their son make the decision for himself. He was still young and had such a promising life ahead of him.

He tilted his head and added, “Of course, they might get jealous once they realize he might know more than them and petition for him to receive 'real world exposure.'”

[Bella]

Lysira's dark eyes flashed even as she smiled. 'Oh, just let them try it,' she said. They both knew that she was in jest, and yet not at the same time. She feared no channeler--she feared nothing at all--when it came to protecting her son. He was her child, her only child, and she would always see to him. No matter the cost.

Still, this was not an evening for such dark matters. There was nothing like that at stake now. Just the light-hearted banter of a husband and a wife about their child.

She did not know what the future held for her Cade. He had yet to express interest in learning if he could channel, and had shown no evidence that he would display it without testing. In reality, he was perfectly content with life as it was. He had his parents, both of them, whom he loved. He had his books. Some friends. He and the son of Gareth Tomason seemed to have bonded, over books.

'Although I do wonder if I should try to encourage him toward other pursuits,' she signed, thoughtfully now. 'But then I think I don't want to try to make him be other than who he is.'

[Jack]

Jerid smiled at his wife. In all his years of knowing her … both before and after their sudden split … the First Seeker knew her to be a formidable person.

Caden Ives had trained her, the Yards had fostered her … and she had endured so much in her life that only made her stronger.

If there was an obstacle that stood between Lyrisa Walker and her son, it would be torn asunder and she would be tap dancing over dead bodies.

The waitress came and they made their food requests. Jerid was simple, with only a mug of mulled cider and simple fare.

He looked at Lysira as she signed. And he smiled softly. Perhaps their son did need to gain a sense of the world beyond the Library. And perhaps now was the time to take advantage of that opportunity.

“Perhaps we might induct him into the history of the Walker family,” he murmured. “My grandson, in his infinite wisdom as High Seat, named me as keeper of Camden Corele in the Mountains of Mist, and invited all of us to stay at Walker Manor for a few days.”

He wasn't happy with the former … since his departure from House politics, he'd enjoyed some freedom. No, having Camden Corele under the assumed control of a person like Jerid Walker was a smart idea. Fewer people would be brazen enough to attack.

But the latter, the invite, served a multitude of opportunities. The Seanchan family that married into House Walker was making good of its promise to restore and politically stabilize the area. Jerid wanted to make sure it wasn't a slow invasion on Andor's northern borders.

His grandson's new wife was also expecting … very soon. And Jerid felt some pride in having another grandchild.

And … it would give Cade an opportunity to study history as it unfolded. It has no secret that Jerid hated the Seanchan. He'd fought a one-man war against them for nearly as long as he could remember.

But … things were changing and Jerid, much to Sojin's credit, began to look past old animosities to something brighter.

“I was thinking it might be a good idea to accept,” he murmured.

[Bella]

At her husband's suggestion, Lysira's first instinct was to say no. She didn't like the idea of her son leaving the Tower at all, for this had built up for them as the place of safety where she kept him. To remove him from its confines would be to invite disaster. Or, so that first instinct would say, but she knew that was a knee-jerk reaction and needed deeper thought.

She looked down to her glass where it sat in her hand, twisting it slightly as she thought it through. Lys did want her son to know more of his family. He had learned much of her lineage while they lived in Cairhien, but not as much about his father's.

Finally, she released her glass to lift her hands. 'You may be right, she signed thoughtfully. 'Cade does need to learn more about his heritage in the Walker line. I could only tell him so much on my own. He also has been spending a bit too much time in the Library, so getting out might be good for him.' She smiled slightly, ruefully.