I Tried To Say I Know You, From Before

[Chris]

The Grey Tower was quite strict with its Healing. Who you were allowed to Heal, what ailments, where and when and often supervised... if you weren't an Aes Sedai or an Asha'man, you could guarantee that you wouldn't be doing a great deal of Healing until you had passed through the Arches. Even then it was not with free reign, which did make sense. Even for Murdock, for which Healing came naturally, it wasn't always going to go to plan. As it hadn't with that Warder trainee.

But at least you could practice your Healing on people.

Some rooting around the Library and some discrete questions to some of the warmer Yellows told Murdock what it was called. Rending. Murdock played the word over and over in his head as he mulled over it and what it could do, probably more often than was entirely necessary or indeed, healthy. It wasn't exactly something he could practice on people, what with how dangerous it could be, but there was a part of Murdock that needed to know what he was capable of. He wanted to push the limits of his ability, stretch them and prove his usefulness in a way that he had never quite been able to before. Blowing up rocks or setting the earth on fire was all well and good, the quintessential Black Tower experience, but that wasn't for Murdock. He lacked the skill and the inclination. Sword fighting as well, that was never really Murdock's strong point even before his injured leg.

So what did a man do, when he wanted to learn something that he wasn't allowed to? A weave that only worked on the living, but he wasn't permitted to use? Well, he did whatever he had to in order to achieve the desired result, and that is what led Murdock back to his old habits.

The important thing was to find a place away from the Grey Tower. Hama Valon was a large place and it was fairly easy to find a secluded house, or a bit of field on the edge of the city, or a copse of trees which hid him from the general public especially in the dusky evenings he tended to loiter in. The last thing he wanted was for someone like that Ravak fellow to find him honing his skills in this way.

It was birds, again. They resisted being Healed by Murdock’s gentle weaves, instead choosing to flop over and die in a mockery of everything Murdock was attempting. If he couldn’t Heal them, if there was no way he could undo the damage he had caused on these birds, then he was going to instead get really, really good at dealing out the aforementioned damage. It was startlingly easy actually, once Murdock got the hang of it, the weaves simply coming to be as if he had always known them, but he had been watching them from the corner of a dark room, through a mirror. Now he was unveiling the truths of them for himself as he took a bird and, for lack of a better word, made sure it was dead. There were plenty of crows in Hama Valon and nobody would miss them.

They wouldn’t miss the rats either. It was the Creator’s will, having someone like Murdock remove these vermin from the earth. There was something poetic about the way a Healing weave, with its Spirit and Fire and Earth, was tailored towards preserving life, but all it took was the slightest of twists, a bit of a kink or an inversion or a mistake in the weave, to turn it into something destructive and quietly, insistently violent. There was less separating life and death than people liked to think.

And so Murdock studied his weaves, using these animals he captured as his experiments. The best part about Rending? When Murdock was done, there was never much of anything left to bury. He simply burned the remains away with Fire and smiled at Giselle, who would clasp her hands together and incline her head as if in agreement with her Dedicated husband.

This particular evening was much like any other of its kind. When Murdock was done with the trials and chores of a Grey Tower which was starting to chafe on him, he would limp to one of his more secluded testing areas, take a seat on a rock or stump or maybe even just the dry, cold grass, and wait with some cheese and bread set nearby for an animal to weave at. There were supposedly some weaves which attracted animals, anti-wards almost, but Murdock lacked the knowledge and skill for those, so sometimes he had no joy finding anything to work on. Most of the time it worked, and as the Dedicated sat there next to Giselle, Saidin at the ready, he knew it was only a matter of time before he caught something to practice Rending with.

OOC: I wrote this because I felt like writing it, but if anyone wishes to intervene then do feel free.

[Jenn]

Curious green eyes watched the tall, thin Dedicated limp away. Murdock Mather. Kaia remembered him from the Infirmary, with the Drin, Danos. What Murdock had done exactly, she couldn't say. She had never seen anything like that before and indeed that was part of the problem. She had seen nothing, with only her Delving to show her the ways in which the young man had been hurt. A spar did not account for that level of damage. The boy had not been bleeding before. The Dedicated had seemed confused. The Drin had been disoriented and tired after her Healing.

She shook her head a little, the thick coil of hair that sat above the nape of her neck shifting ever-so-slightly. Danos was an adorable boy, to be sure. The very corners of her mouth lifted. A gift of thanks, the note had said, for Healing him. The beautiful carving of a woman dancing, poised and graceful, framed by a rising flame sat on her desk. It garnered no small amount of teasing from Jaryd and stony faced glares from Ravak, the latter which served as fond amusement.

She felt along each bond for them both, comforted by their presences in her mind. Jaryd pressed back against her awareness, a soft caress. Curiosity tinged with concern from Ravak. The usual fare. She chuckled inwardly, her warmth reassuring.

Kaia's attention shifted and she studied the retreating form of Murdock for several more minutes, dainty finger tapping against full lips. I am going to follow him. She started forward before she lost sight of him entirely, maneuvering easily through the paths, streets, and crowds alike. As she made her way through the grounds of the Grey Tower and then out into Hama Valon proper, a small annoying voice began reminding her of the three dozen things she should be doing at this exact moment, all of which involved the mountain of paperwork that had no visible end. She snorted inwardly and ignored that voice.

The Red glanced around curiously, keeping the black-coated figure of the Dedicated in sight. Where was he going? Surely if he sought to leave Hama Valon itself, he would not simply try to walk out... not with that limp. Her head lifted slightly at the sight of trees, majestic and imposing. It was between those that he slipped between.

The petite Domani allowed a quarter of an hour to pass before she resumed her forward pace. As she approached, she held herself on the brink of embracing, not because she felt threatened by the Dedicated, but because it simply seemed the prudent thing to do. As she pushed her way through the trees, she was greeted by the sight of a secluded meadow, pristine and peaceful. Murdock seated on a nearby log. Bread and cheese laid out in a conspicuous spot in front of him. And...

Disgust registered a fraction of a second before turning into full blown panic, her blood becoming ice in her veins as she jumped up onto the log next to the very surprised Dedicated. Kaia stamped her feet a little and made a noise that was halfway between a curse and a cry. She spun out thick flows of fire, and the large black rat that had been enticed by the promise of food was promptly reduced to a pile of cinder and ash before she could so much as blink.

The small Aes Sedai realized then that she was holding onto the Source. And that she had very nearly set Murdock's boots on fire as well. Flawless emerald eyes swung down to meet deep brown and Kaia directed her most dazzling smile at the Dedicated before letting the serene mask fall into place. She stepped off the log with the same grace that a Queen might step away from her throne, releasing her hold on saidar.

"I wanted to speak to you about what happened in the Infirmary," she began with preamble, "with the Drin, Danos. I am curious if you remember what you did?" She gestured to the pile of ashes at his feet, her expression shifting slightly. "I apologize for singeing your boots. I do not like rodents." That was an understatement. She went to eye the bread and the cheese. "Were you trying to capture that foul thing? For what purpose?"

[Jenny]

The whispers trickled through the ranks of the Black Ajah. Someone was targeting rats and crows in Hama Valon. Someone was blinding the Great Lord's eyes and ears.

The news reached Mirin quickly. Recently, she had deduced, to her pleasant surprise, that she ranked fairly high in the hierarchy of the Black Ajah. High enough to angle for a seat of the Supreme Council someday, although she would never breathe a word of her ambition unless she wanted to die. Right now, however, she felt secure, if not quite comfortable, in her position as Mistress of Novices.

Her fingers no longer trembled as they had in the past as she slipped out the note from its hidden spot behind the tapestry just outside her quarters. In the safety of her room, she deciphered the message and burned it with a thread of Fire. She moved efficiently - her fellow Black Ajah, Emmond Salere, valued efficiency; and she was beginning to suspect that the man was more powerful than he let on - and soon she was riding on the back of a dappled grey horse through the busy streets of Hama Valon. The bustling crowd, absorbed in their own day-to-day tasks, did not part easily before her. She glanced down at the common folk disdainfully, wishing that the crowd would move faster.

One of the secret Blue Ajah weaves offered a way to call animals. With the glow of saidar surrounding her, she wove threads of Air, Earth, and Spirit. Despite her years of study, Mirin was weak with Earth, and she wove those threads with particular care.

A bird - a crow - flew past her. Her weave spun forward, tagging it on its wing. She tied it off. The crow circled once before flapping off. She watched the ground for rodents, and tagged those as well.

Three dozen weaves. Breathing quickly with the effort of channeling, she released saidar. She rubbed her temple. Though the weaves, tied securely, did not require any effort to maintain, the awareness of three dozen little animals made her head ache. She wondered, briefly, if this plan would work. Three dozen animals - out of hundreds, perhaps even thousands, in Hama Valon. She dismissed the thought. If none of the animals were caught today, then she would simply come back tomorrow.

The thought made her tired. Mirin sighed and turned her horse toward the Band of Brothers. While she waited, she might as well have a drink. Or two.

She was on her third when she sensed a weave dissipate. One moment it was there - and the next, it was gone. Mirin blinked and stood. A few minutes later, she returned to the Band of Brothers. It had been a cat. Perhaps next time I should bring some papers to grade, she thought sourly. She flipped another coin at the barkeep.

An hour later, she was in a much better mood. She lifted her pint of ale, admiring the amber light that shone through the glass. Perhaps this task was going to make her an alcoholic, she thought, somewhat happily. She should definitely visit the Band of Brothers more often. Then she frowned. There was a sense of... something missing. Ah, that's right. A weave, she thought. Where had it come from? She climbed to her feet, a task that seemed somehow more difficult than it should. Surely she was not drunk!

She almost took her pint with her, but the barkeep stopped her at the door. Mirin rolled her eyes and shoved the glass at him. She called for the stablehand to saddle her horse, and then went searching for where the weave had disappeared. Soon, she arrived at a secluded meadow near the outskirts of Hama Valon, hidden inside a grove of trees.

She pulled up her horse as she drew nearer. The evening light was dimming, and she almost missed the man seated on a log. There was a woman, too, petite and beautiful. To her surprise, she recognized them both.

"Kaia Sedai and... Dedicated... Murdock? What a wonderful coincidence, bumping into the two of you this evening! I must say, the weather has been simply too gorgeous not to enjoy with a little outdoor rendezvous. Although," - her eyes fell to the neat pile of ashes at Murdock's feet - ", isn't it a little warm for a campfire?"

She giggled. Then she clasped her hand to her mouth. She hadn't giggled since she was - Light, how long had it been? No matter. Aes Sedai simply did not giggle. She tried to rearrange her face to something that resembled Aes Sedai calm, but instead she smiled happily, seeming and feeling younger than she had in years.
((OOC: I...and Mirin... got a little carried away. But a tipsy Mistress of Novices seems fun, yes? ))

[Chris]

Murdock’s dark eyes scanned the area, but much of the time they were drawn back to himself and Giselle, who he imagined to be sat next to him. He didn’t talk to her, part of him knew she was long dead and that talking would only make him look like he’d been tainted by Saidin even though it was long since cleansed...

He thought he heard scuttling. His Saidin-enhanced ears twitched almost, and he turned to look in the direction of what he knew to be a rat. Aha! At last, his waiting had paid off. He almost smiled, cold in the void, at his food fortune. He was patient, oh so patient, sitting still and making no noise as the rat scuttled closer to its prize. When it was fully distracted, Murdock would strike.

But someone else beat him to it. His arms shivered violently as the rat suddenly burst into flames, and Giselle was cast away, replaced by some short Aes Sedai who had no business being there and standing where Giselle had been sitting. The Dedicated was on his feet in an instant, surprise at the sudden interruption and indignation at his wife’s disappearance in his eyes making him move quicker than his leg allowed. Cursing under his breath, he reached down to snatch up his walking stick, meeting the woman’s brilliant green eyes. Burn me to ash, he grumped, recognising the diminutive woman at last. Kaia Sedai. Of all the people it had to be. He took a deep breath, his expression very neutral now and Saidin far from his mind. Murdock’s salute was sharp and his bow appropriate, though as he straightened up he was momentarily amused that even with the log to stand on, this Aes Sedai was still not as tall as he. Giselle always did say he’d spent his childhood growing taller instead of thinking, and perhaps she was right. It was a well known Far Madding saying that boys didn’t become men, they just grew taller and hairier.

Any hopes that she didn’t remember his incident in the Infirmary were quickly dashed away as apparently that was at the forefront of her mind. As if it wasn’t enough to kill his rat, warm his toes and remove Giselle from the scene, she wanted to ask him about the intricacies of Saidin? The Dedicated hoped his irritation didn’t cross his placid face, but he was no Aes Sedai and restraint was not always easy even for the normally stoic man.

He had an idea of what he had done. Murdock was starting to realise what it was he could do, the power he held with Saidin. It wasn’t Earthsinging, no. And he was no fighter, not like those who threw the fire with reckless abandon or swung swords around like extensions of their bodies. No, Murdock was more personal, more private. The subtle abilities he was starting to learn about had a sense of appropriateness to them.

Did he want to talk about it with the Aes Sedai though? Not a single bloody bit. Light, how did he get out of this woman’s gaze, because he was not at all comfortable with the way she was looking at him. Beautiful, well put together and direct, this was something he was used to with his wife. He didn’t need it from someone else as well... it felt too much like cheating on Giselle’s memory.

“Sometimes my Healing doesn’t work like it’s supposed to,” he began to say reluctantly, because he wasn’t quite sure there was any other way of putting it. Too honest to try and lie, Murdock simply went for the easiest option, which was the truth. A simplified version of the truth. He didn’t want to talk about the rat, and he really didn’t want to mention the birds he’d been catching before that Ravak fellow found him. The Master of Arms now, Light.

Was it better or worse, when the Mistress of Novices herself made an appearance with her horse, like something from a Gleeman’s tale? Murdock turned to get a look at the woman who had him working in the Infirmary before, the temptation to remark on the “wonderful coincidence” she claimed this to be. The woman was surprisingly chipper for, well, for being who she was, and Murdock couldn’t help but wonder if the two women had set this up between them. What were they planning, exactly? He gave her a salute as well, wondering if he was going to have to learn to Travel before he could get away from these meddling women. No doubt they’d find him wherever he went.

“This was not a campfire, Mirin Sedai,” Murdock replied, his voice very calm. He was always quiet and calm, at least when he wasn’t being riled up by idiot trainees or being prodded too much about his family. “It was a rodent, but Kaia Sedai took good care of it.” It wouldn’t surprise the man if Mirin Sedai knew this and was simply testing him, but all he could do in his current position was play along with their little double team effort and hope he didn’t get into too much trouble. If he did, well, he would simply have to revise his plans for this particular brand of training.

[Jenny]

Mirin tossed her head, and smiled brilliantly. Her dark curls fell in picturesque disarray across her shoulders.

"Good," she said. "I hate pests."

She glanced at Kaia Sedai and the corners of her lips imperceptibly tightened. If it was the Keeper targeting the eyes of the Great Lord, then... things would get very difficult. Blood and bloody ashes! The woman was influential in the Tower, had two bondmates who just happened to be the Master of Training and the Keeper of Archives, and was strong in the Power. Mirin felt her headache starting back up and regretted leaving her ale behind.

She shifted her attention back to Murdock, but was distracted when she noticed bread and cheese lying on the ground. Was it... bait?

"If not a campfire, then a picnic? Ha! Although it doesn't seem very likely with the fare lying in the dirt." She laughed again, although this time her mirth didn't seem to quite reach her eyes. Then, the world seemed to spin and she swayed in her saddle. "I need to get down," she muttered to herself, and began to clumsily climb her way off her horse.

[Jenn]

Flawless emerald orbs watched as the other woman dismounted unsteadily, her eyes and her face expressionless. Now how was she supposed to find out what it was that the Dedicated had done in the Infirmary? Kaia clicked her tongue against the roof of her mouth, suppressing her irritation at the unexpected interruption. She took a deep breath and reordered her thoughts.

It would not do to upset the Mistress of Novices. Historic tension between the Blue and Red Ajahs aside - White Tower business, not Grey, Kaia reminded herself firmly - this Mirin had once been a mentor to Reen. For that fact alone, the petite Domani would try to be kind.

"No, not a picnic," the rich velvety voice of the Keeper of the Chronicles replied pleasantly. "I had business I wanted to discuss with Dedicated Murdock. I'd have preferred a picnic to the hideous rodent." A flicker of amusement passed over her face as she glanced over to the bread and cheese laying innocuously in the dirt.

She studied Mirin from beneath half-lowered lashes. She and the Blue Sister were of a similar height, the whip-thin man positively towering over them both. A furrow of concern crossed perfect coppery features as she saw the other woman's slight wobble. "Are you well, Sister?" Kaia hesitated a moment, her look at the Dedicated sidelong and considering, before she stepped towards the Mistress of Novices. "I can offer you Healing, if you are not."

[Chris]

The longer Murdock stood there, the more uncomfortable he began to feel. The two women felt like the sides of a pincer attack, closing in on his position and there was nothing he could do about it. The Far Madding man wished he could hide the bread and cheese, hide the ashes, hide himself even, but now he had two Aes Sedai growing inevitably closer to discovering what he was doing. Then you won’t be allowed to channel unsupervised ever again, he thought to himself, and Murdock’s expression hardened slightly.

With any luck they would be able to change the subject and move away from what he did in the Infirmary, as well as what he had planned to do to that rat. There was no proof. The bread and cheese could have been left by anyone. Murdock could keep his placid expression on and simply shake his head at any questions thrown his way, but if it came to that, would he?

The Mistress of Novices appeared to be having some trouble getting down from her horse, and the man was tempted to offer his assistance. But in the end he didn’t, because if she fell to the floor then that would have been most amusing, and something he could have used as a distraction to get out of there. Besides which, how often did one see an Aes Sedai faceplant? Not nearly often enough.

Now that the Blue Aes Sedai was on the ground, Murdock found that he was in quite the Aes Sedai sandwich, and that was one particular food item he did not want to be a part of. Light, but they were both short, shorter than most women as far as he could tell (Murdock was used to seeing the top of people’s heads). That didn’t help him with getting away from the women, so he had to wrack his brains for some other inspiration.

Moving on from the bread and cheese, the Dedicated looked towards the Mistress of Novices as well. She seemed unsteady on her feet, but not overly so. Dismounting the horse had not been very steady either but as a man who preferred his two feet, Murdock couldn’t fault her for that. That being said, he was starting to get the sneaking suspicion that if this was anyone else, anyone who wasn’t an Aes Sedai, then they would be a little tipsy. Surely not though? Aes Sedai did not drink, did they? At least, not where they could be seen (and consequently judged). Holding back on his opinions momentarily, he said “Aes Sedai, I find that sitting out here with my thoughts does wonders when I am feeling unwell. Whether it is of the body or the mind, some time out here can be most refreshing. If you would like to sit with us a while I would be most honoured to share my secret resting space with you both.” He gave the two women as charming a smile as he could manage, and if it had reached up to meet his eyes then perhaps it would have been quite the dashing gesture. As it was, he simply looked tired.

Oh well, if he was going to be squished between the Keeper of the Chronicles and the Mistress of Novices, he may as well make himself comfortable. If the woman wanted his assistance in sitting down he would of course oblige, but if not then he was going to plonk himself on his seat once more and stretch his leg out. Perhaps covering the pile of ash. Out of sight, out of mind.

[Jenny]

Business, to discuss? What on earth could the Keeper want with a Dedicated? Were they working together? Dozens of choice curses buzzed through Mirin's mind but she bit her tongue. One slipped out anyways.

"Bloody buttered onions," she muttered. She looked up to see the Keeper watching her. Her beautiful face showed nothing but concern.

Mirin scowled. "I am perfectly well," she said. She exhaled sharply, and shook her head - and then clutched for her horse's reins to steady herself. No! She was not drunk! She lead her horse to the nearest tree, and cocked her head when Murdock spoke. Hm. So, the man wanted to share his secret resting space with the two of them eh? That seemed to mean that Kaia, too, was an intruder in this foresty private sanctuary.

She looked searchingly at Murdock. The man appeared tired, and that attempt at a smile - he must be hiding something. It was him! He was the one who must have set out the bread and cheese. He was the one who has been blinding the Dark Lord's eyes. A thin smile appeared on her lips. Good, this made her job easier. She tied off the reins of her horse so that it wouldn't wander off, and then approached the two sitting in the clearing. Usually a graceful woman, her walk held a cat-like, predatory feel as she stalked towards the Dedicated.

"I hope you don't mind me sitting with you as you discuss your... business," she said, smiling a bit too widely. "I think that my head is a bit achey. No, I do not need Healing, Kaia Sedai, although I appreciate the offer. It is just stress. I think the fresh air would suffice."

[Jenn]

Green eyes blinked at the unexpected change that came over Mirin as the Blue advanced towards Murdock. What was this? The scowl shown so openly had been surprising, but Kaia supposed that the slip of composure was understandable; they were surrounded by nothing but trees at the moment. Still. The Red Aes Sedai tensed. Something in the way the other woman's eyes glittered reminded the petite Domani of the cold, grey chips of ice that looked out to regard Keeper and Dedicated from the pale pretty face.

Bloody flaming ashes. How had this gotten so complicated? Kaia wanted nothing more than to reach up the pinch the bridge of her nose, her fingers twitching as she kept her arms down by her side instead. Light, she just wanted to question the Dedicated about what he had done in the Infirmary with the Drin, Danos. Perhaps even to explain to her what weaves he had used. This, whatever was happening right now, would not give her any answers.

Murdock seemed uncomfortable. She studied the tall lanky man, ignoring Mirin for a moment. Why did he seem so uneasy? Granted, being set upon by the Keeper of the Chronicles as well as the Mistress of Novices probably did not rank high on the number of things one would enjoy... And yet he had come out here. His secret resting place. He had set out bread and cheese. For that rat? For something. Why? She supposed a man could do what he wished to in his own space, but again... why would anyone wish to lure a rat? Her tongue clicked against the roof of her mouth.

Well. Enough with this pointless dancing around.

White teeth leapt out from coppery skin as the raven-haired woman smiled at Mirin and Murdock, the warmth of her expression failing to touch green eyes. "I understand that all too well, Sister. Come, let us sit. I am certain the fresh air will do us all some good."

Carefully crafted words, no lies... not full truths either. Kaia hated it all, with a fervent passion, her face a mask of perfect serenity as she eased herself down onto the giant log that dominated the small clearing. "As I said earlier, I came here with a few questions for the Dedicated about an incident that occurred in the Infirmary. A Drin came in needing some help. I did not see exactly what happened, and was hoping that Murdock would be able to clarify." She made an absent gesture. "To satisfy my curiosity, mostly. I have an interest in Healing, seeing as my bondmates are usually finding ways to run straight into danger."

The velvet of her voice was pleasant as she looked inquiringly between the Dedicated and the Mistress of Novices. "And you, Sister?" Kaia indicated Mirin's nearby horse. "I understand that your responsibilities sometimes take you far away from the Tower. It is good then, that you happened upon this place as well. It would seem that you have a good eye for this, Murdock." Such a peaceful little place, out in the middle of nowhere, that you both 'just happened' upon. "I wonder how many more places like this lie around Hama Valon?" she mused out loud.