Things Fall Apart; The Centre Cannot Hold [Attn: Sojin Majere Gaidin]

[Bella]

It was with a deep sigh of longing that Miahala and Sojin rode away from the farm.

She planned to return, and hoped that nothing should happen to prevent it. Still, she could not help but be sorrowful at only having been able to be around them for so short a period in the first place. She was like a flower that had begun to blossom in the warmth of spring, only to be killed off in the surprise of a late frost.

There was not as much conversation this time, the heavy trod of their horses feet beneath them as they moved briskly along the winding, little used roads of this area of the Saldean countryside. She would know her way in the dark, though the sun was only just beginning to set. Her senses roamed around her, watchful for any trouble the further north they proceeded.

Soon, however, the sun was dipping well below the horizon and the moon only allowed for so much light to travel by. They determined to make camp and fell into the easy pattern they had set during the trip here: creating a modest fire, not so much to draw undue attention but to keep warm and cook by; setting out beds; tending horses; preparing food.

Yet Mia was quiet this time, her mind working itself away from the camaraderie of the road and the warmth of family to become the warrior once again.

A fight was ahead.

[Jack]

Sojin stared into the fire, and much like Miahala, prepared himself for the fight to come.

On many fronts, he was sure. Trollocs and Fades did not frighten him. He had faced Dreadlords that had captured his Aes Sedai when he was still but part of the learning ranks.

Seanchan, zealous bandits fighting under the pretense of the Lord Dragon, rouge Shaido Aiel … all of those were simple compared to matters of the heart.

The silver-haired Gaidin quietly began running a sharpening stone over his jian. His family blade, the broadsword that remained nearby, didn't need such preparation.

He looked at Miahala briefly, noting the Aes Sedai's quiet nature. The solace and companionship they had enjoyed on the road had been one of the most pleasurable times in his life. For once he didn't have to worry about letting his guard down, and the nights had been memorable.

But when they returned, Miahala would become the Amyrlin Seat again.

“Miahala, there's something I need to inform you about,” Sojin said after a spell, wiping his blade and sheathing it once more. His sapphire eyes danced in the fire light as he steeled himself for words he knew needed to be spoken.

“After we are done here and you are ready to return to the Tower, I will not be returning through the gates with you,” he murmured. “I will be leaving the Warder Yards, and I do not know when I shall return.”

[Bella]

His words caught her off guard; it wasn't what she had been expecting to hear. Although, she hadn't been expecting anything specifically, but knew as much to know that that wasn't it. The Aes Sedai, the woman, felt a small pain stab through her heart. The emotional gates slammed shut within her and the look in her eyes was once again impassive and reserved.

"Your life to live as you wish," she said simply, without inflection. Still, there was a strange feeling tightening around her throat. "Might I ask what brought you to that decision? What do you intend to do?"

[Jack]

If he weren't prepared, Sojin would have almost winced at the the lack of emotion in Miahala's response. It was worse than blocking Trolloc's warhamer blow, or being shot by an arrow and he had been the recipient of those on multiple occasions.

“Yes, my life to live,” Sojin echoed. It was funny how everything over the last decade was anything but his choice. He served first as High Seat after his father vanished, presumed dead, and then found himself acting as its “advisor” when it came to complicated things.

He spent more times outside the yard than in it these days.

“I know not where I will go,” Sojin murmured. “Perhaps to the Citadel or back to the Shen an Calhar.”

Her first question still burned in his mind and he was quiet for a moment.

“I've no place in the Yards anymore, Aes Sedai,” Sojin said. “I was removed from it for too long, and what little time I do spend there diminishes day by day. This, here, now, with you was perhaps the closest I've felt connected to that place in years ...and that has more to do with you than duty.”

[Bella]

Well, what did you really expect, foolish woman? It was that voice again. She hadn't really heard much at all of it since she had been traveling with Sojin, and she had liked the unexpected break. As she had never been a woman prone to self-doubt, this odd, snide little voice of self-castigation that had sprung up since becoming Amyrlin was unusual, and equally unwelcome.

Now, it had returned. It was chiding her about the odd inward pain. A few rolls in the hay and you're as taken as a girl still in braids. Mia had never been like that, even when she was still in the braids and dresses of girlhood. Her dolls ran off to join the cavalry as much as they ran off to get married, after all.

You are Miahala Sedai. You have braved armies. You are a Green! Snap out of it!

Yet for all of the voices venom, hearing that he would be leaving the Grey Tower upon their return still struck a painful note inside her. This trip had made her feel more alive than she had since she'd returned to, well, the land of the living. Would she lose that then? Would she never find it again, and become as the stones of the Tower?

The Dream again...

What else had she expected, however? That he would return to the Tower with her and they might continue...what? This was all born of travels, the unburdening of themselves. When she was back, she took on the stole and ascended her place as Amyrlin Seat and who in their right mind would want to lash themselves in any way to someone with that hanging 'round their necks?

No, to think he would do anything less was mistaken, and the pain was...foolish. In seeking to banish the self-doubt creeping in, she simply forced herself to accept those as truths.

And move on.

Miahala inhaled slowly and looked up at the line of the sky through the trees. It was dark now. The moon and the fire offered some light, yet it still seemed so very dim in the world around her then. She thought she heard an eagle call somewhere in the distance, but was undoubtedly imagining it. "We should get some rest," she finally said. "Tomorrow will be a long day."

She said nothing more on his departure from the Tower because he had made his point very clear, and she would not argue against what he felt was right. Thus, what more was there to say?

[Jack]

Sojin inclined his head, all too aware of the impact his words might have had on Miahala. Light knew they had a powerful weight on his shoulders.

Was this why his father so stubbornly resisted bonding at one time?

Perhaps, but the man had quickly overcome that.

So was he the fool then? Without a doubt, you are perhaps the most stubborn fool this side of the Dragonwall. Or the other side.

Riahana was right in one thing: he pushed people away and perhaps this is what he was doing with Miahala.

He inclined his head slightly at Miahala's suggestion and murmured, “I'll keep watch for a few hours before retiring. Sleep well, Miahala Sedai.”

Then he was silent. Firelight flickered in his eyes as he contemplated his future. The Citadel was perhaps the logical choice: he would still serve the Tower and provide some counsel, however small, to Tower Guard and young trainees alike who came there.

Part of him perhaps wanted Miahala to pummel some sense into him, tell him he was off his rocker and demand he return to the Yards to at least explain himself to the Warder Council.

But she wouldn't. Perhaps that was because she knew stubborn minds couldn't be deterred. He wasn't a Warder that could be counted on, merely a person who could offer some counsel and an ear, and watch her back when it was absolutely necessary.

Those were the last thoughts he dwelled on before he took to slumber.

~ ~

“Yer a fool, big brother," came the fiery voice he had become too familiar with over the last few months.

Sojin looked around and found himself in a large room very similar to the Novice Learning Ranks common room. It was empty of people except for a tall red-haired woman with gold-flecked eyes and a pretty smile. She was taller than him by perhaps a few inches, and any other man or woman would find her a gorgeous sight to behold.

The young woman sat over a board of stones. The pieces were scattered in no particular pattern.

In life, Bryn Sevia Riverstone Walker had been the daughter of Jerid Walker and an Aiel Wise One's apprentice, and a Novice with a rebellious streak a league long. In death … she wasn't much better, but she also seemed determined to haunt his dreams and offer advice.

“And why is that, Bryn Walker?” he asked casually, as he sat down to study the stone board.

“That Aes Sedai yer traveling with, she's an amazing person … and she's gotten ya to open up and get that sword out of yer arse over the last few weeks,” the Aiel said lightheartedly. “Light, but she's gorgeous, too … and I had a mind to bed her myself ...”

“Bryn …” Sojin cautioned, his eyes looking toward his half-sister. She certainly never held back what was on her mind when she was young … and now … Light, but she was a handful.

“Why do ya resist, Sojin Majere?” was the more direct question. “It's not the reasons ya say they are. Ya came to term with those decisions years ago. Yer afraid of what might yet become.”

Sojin smiled and murmured, “And if it was so, little sister, what would you know other than what you've garnered in this place?”

She smiled softly and reached across to touch her brother's hand. Gold-flecked green eyes met deep blue and she said, “I loved and lost because of a foolish mistake. Instead of staying here, I chased ghosts for a decade and a woman I loved is now gone. Ya are prepared to make the same mistake.”

Shaking his head, Sojin stood. “Bryn, you don't know what you're talking about.”

“Then why do you doubt your decision, Sojin Majere?”

~ ~

Sojin woke suddenly, aware of the predawn hours. Light, but those dreams could be a nightmare sometimes. And the worst part was, they weren't the normal ones.

And the words that Bryn spoke were annoyingly true. He shrugged the thought away and forced himself up to prepare for the day ahead.

It was a normal routine: Prepare the morning meal, a quick bite this time, break camp, prepare the horses and ride out. Sojin managed without any conversation toward Miahala this time. It was one part contemplation and one part desire to not further inflict pain on the Aes Sedai or himself.

So instead he prepared himself for the battle to come and the likely chance that when the dust settled, it would be a long and quiet travel back to the Grey Tower.

[Bella]

There had been a routine developed for the nights before, and her sleep was suddenly much colder. She did not dream that night, nor Dream, and even the voice was quiet. It had said enough, for the time being. She knew as she drifted off that it would return again before long and undoubtedly with a vengeance. It was chatter incessantly during the Hall.

Come morning, the silence and the cold continued. The morning dawned warmly, but she didn't feel it.

This day, she dressed in her riding clothes--as she had been--but added an extra pair of knives to the ones she usually wore. She braided her hair tightly and kept it tossed back, free from her face. The camp was packed. As she worked, she considered telling Sojin to leave now. It still...stung on some level, no matter what she told herself.

She tried to put everything she felt in boxes, shelve them away, but some were persistent. There was something like...anger as well, and she was struggling to not tell him to just go about his business now. She could handle the outpost on her own. She could handle everything and anything on her own, because she so often had.

Miahala Sha'hal needed no one.

The Citadel was here in the Blight Border, after all. He could just ride on... Yet she wasn't an idiot. Her pride had limits before reaching to stupidity, and a sword-arm at a Borderland outpost would be foolish to turn away. And that's what he was here: a sword-arm, and one that would be of use to her and the beleaguered soldiers holding back the darkness.

They mounted and rode on, that cold wind following.
* * * As she had said, they reached the outpost right around midday. When it was distantly in sight, Mia embraced saidar and let it flood her mind. Her senses sharpened. The Shadow's life here drew her attention and the beast that lived in her, for a beast there was when battle was at hand, wanted to raze it all to the ground.

Upon approach, she lifted her face for the guards to see and she was recognized instantly. They called for the gates to be opened and they rode inside. A young soldier, still obviously consigned to the more menial tasks, ran up to take their horses as they dismounted. Ahead of them, Commander Alnar approached.

"My Lady Sedai," he greeted with a wearied smile. "I am sorry to pull you from your family, but I hope you understand that I could not ignore such a boon so close."

"I understand, Commander," she replied graciously. A faint smile curved her lips, although her expression remained otherwise impassive. "I would present Sojin Gaidin, also of the Grey Tower. He was traveling with me as a guard and has agreed to lend his aid as well."

"Gaidin," Alnar said with equal gratitude and a gesture of respect. "Your sword will be appreciated."

After Sojin had offered his response, Mia turned to Alnar. It was all business now. "Aside from the usual, what has your outpost in such dire straits?"

"I cannot tell you why, but the enemy--" He gestured to the northside of the fort. It's heavy wooden fortifications showed signs of the stress put upon them even on the inside. "--has apparently decided we are a ripe target, although I've heard from other outposts that they are all under new siege. I don't know what they know that we don't, but it seems they have it out for us.

"My scouts have been able to identify a location near here that they believe is the source of the extra numbers coming for us, either a leader or some sort of portal or... I don't know. But we have reason to believe--"

The sound of a chorus of bestial roars and the pounding of metal sounded to the north. "Incoming!" a guard shouted. Immediately, the moderately busy outpost exploded like a beehive that had been kicked. Archers with their bows rushed upward, while any guard not fully with weaponry ran to fetch them.

Mia took off with the rest to the northern wall.

OOC: Email. <3

[Jack]

Sojin rode quietly ahead of Miahala during the entire trip, his sapphire eyes scanning the area from beneath his wide-brimmed hat, his ears alert. The years as a soldier and a Warder afforded him the luxury to keep him focused on that, and banish other thoughts to a deep recess.

It was perhaps best to think that way for now. He was a shield to protect Miahala if necessary, but otherwise defend an ally from an enemy that could do unknown damage if it overwhelmed the small outpost's defenses and flooded into Saldaea.

His time in the Tower also saw duty along the Blightborder. The Citadel had been his home for close to six months, and the constant sorties by Shadowspawn kept him honed to their danger.

This place ahead of them, while no Citadel, was just as crucial to that defense.

Sojin dismounted, retrieving his jian blade and properly thanking the young soldier tasked with the labor. As he fell in step with the Aes Sedai, nary a word escaped him as he studied the area.

Not a soul in here had probably seen more than a few winks of sleep. They were on edge, from the officers to the lowest servants still here. It was like the Trollocs had thrown wave after wave in an attempt to wear the walls down like the wind would a mountain.

Only, the latter took centuries and millennia. Overwhelming an outpost would take months at best … less if your soldiers were denied a good sleep.

When the Aes Sedai was greeted by the outpost commander, Commander Alnar, as he heard right, Sojin inclined his head slightly. Even the leader was wearied by the battle. Light, no wonder they called for an Aes Sedai.

“May Light and Grace strengthen your sword, and pray it see only peace, Commander,” Sojin murmured. “Thank you for your welcome.”

Sojin listened carefully as Alnar filled Miahala in on the details, but his eyes continued to observe everything. He had a sinking filling that there was a deeper, albeit bloody, meaning to this brute force series of attacks.

Weaken the enemy along the border, hope that one can get through and then double back and flank the enemy. Or perform a good ol' fashion raid into the heartlands, hitting one village after another, sowing chaos in Trolloc fist's wake.

He was about to voice such a theory when the alarm sounded.

And like everyone else, Sojin made his way, a half-step ahead of Miahala toward the northern wall. His eyes focused on the wave of Trollocs in the distance, gaining ground. A large wave.

“Blood and flaming ashes,” he muttered.

[Bella]

To either side of them as they stood on the upper wall, looking at the dark horde approaching them, archers were readying their bows and the commander looked at the situation before them. This was no subtle attack. It was a blunt force strike, but of a large group upon an exhausted foe. She felt the need for blood rise up in her and she knew this was a good place to feed any...unpleasant emotions she had been feeling before. Fuel for the fire, as if it was needed.

Mia lifted her hands and held them out before her. She didn't need the gesture to channel, but she knew it was less unnerving for the people around her. This was a group she did not want to unnerve.

Saidar sang in harmony with Saldea's music in her soul. She pulled on thick cords of Earth. Unusual for a woman, so often she had been told, but it was among her strongest powers. Her raw power fed hard into it as she wrapped it around the very dirt beneath the horde's feet, her range better than that of the archers. The ground shook. Then it suddenly yawned into a chasm before them, sending the first two lines of their ranks careening into it. Bones were broken, and Trolloc beasts immobilized.

Those behind did not much care for those ahead, just waiting until the bodies in the void piled high enough for them to use as a bridge of flesh to allow them to continue their charge.

While they were still far enough out to not risk the outpost's soldiers, she continued to send pulses of Earth beneath them. It shook the ground they ran upon, making balance difficult at best. They would crash into one another or fall, though most would get back up and continue the charge until crashing and falling again. It slowed them down and made them easier targets for the archers, who were now in range to unleash their first volleys. These arrows fell with strikes of lightning that struck the back lines, sending charred flesh flying.

Yet even with their numbers rapidly dwindling, those numbers were so great as to still come on and in a force to be reckoned with. Mia cursed audibly at the sheer volume of the force, wondering how such an army had gotten so close with almost no warning at all...

[Jack]

Sojin had only ever seen one wave like this before: while he and Saphire were evacuating a Borderland village two decades ago.

Of course, then she couldn't do much more damage than what Miahala did — well, it had been lightning instead of earthquakes — due to her pregnancy but it had given most people precious few minutes to escape through a gateway.

As he saw the carnage unfold before his eyes beneath, he had to admit a whole new level of respect for the the Green turned Amyrlin Seat. The earth might as well have bowed to her whim, devastating the horde with no mercy.

But in the end it didn't do much good as they kept coming.

Sword in hand, the silver-haired Gaidin stood near the Aes Sedai, watching the scene unfold. As horde moved closer, Sojin noticed the archers starting to fire from the walls.

“Language, Aes Sedai,” Sojin admonished with a wry smile. “You might give some of these boys new and colorful ideas to vex their commander.”

Of course, the enemy still continued to advance and Sojin swore in his own colorful fashion, words otherwise too strong to say in polite company.

His eyes went back to the archers, noticing one group to either side firing into the heart of the enemy.

Sojin grabbed a passing officer by the shoulder and pointed toward the left flank. “Tell your archers to fire at the outsides. Focus on those areas and the Trollocs will cluster. That way the Aes Sedai will be able to better pulverize them.”

He turned back just as the first arrows from the Trolloc horde unleashed. They were few and far in between and Trollocs were normally lousy shots. But one came straight for the Aes Sedai ... and missed as the Gaidin pulled her a hair to the right.

"Careful, Aes Sedai," he murmured.