“I keep wanting to ask you to stay safe, but that’s hardly in the job description of a Red, now, is it.” Fingers in his hair rendered immediate response impossible, waves of lazy warmth and joy radiating through Jaryd's mind like summer sun. He closed his eyes and relaxed, the ever-present tension in his wiry body leaching away until he thought he might melt into the bed and disappear. His exhaustion bled through the pleasant haze, but it did not reduce his sense of total ease.
Jaren’s comment floated there with him. The Andoran had always been selfless and quietly brave in his words and actions, but to have such caring directed at him took Jaryd’s breath away. An order or a demand might have led to sharp words and conflict, but that quiet concern...the Red found himself wanting to soothe away his lover’s fear, and frustrated that he could not.
When he finally spoke, the Altaran’s voice was a low, almost wistful, murmur. “The Red Ajah does what it does. For me...I am a street rat with a dream...one that will drive me until I die for it, Jaren. That is all I have ever been and all I ever will be. I accepted the consequences for myself long ago, but it is much harder to accept that they may apply to-” His eyes fluttered open and he studied the other man’s face thoughtfully. “To the man I love.” The force of feeling behind that simple statement took him by surprise; he took a shaky breath before continuing.
“I cannot promise to be safe; I would break that vow inside a week. However, if you insist on staying with me,” and his voice made it clear how very much he appreciated that decision, “the least I can do is promise to talk to you before I do anything profoundly unwise. Does that suffice?”
Jaren’s comment floated there with him. The Andoran had always been selfless and quietly brave in his words and actions, but to have such caring directed at him took Jaryd’s breath away. An order or a demand might have led to sharp words and conflict, but that quiet concern...the Red found himself wanting to soothe away his lover’s fear, and frustrated that he could not.
When he finally spoke, the Altaran’s voice was a low, almost wistful, murmur. “The Red Ajah does what it does. For me...I am a street rat with a dream...one that will drive me until I die for it, Jaren. That is all I have ever been and all I ever will be. I accepted the consequences for myself long ago, but it is much harder to accept that they may apply to-” His eyes fluttered open and he studied the other man’s face thoughtfully. “To the man I love.” The force of feeling behind that simple statement took him by surprise; he took a shaky breath before continuing.
“I cannot promise to be safe; I would break that vow inside a week. However, if you insist on staying with me,” and his voice made it clear how very much he appreciated that decision, “the least I can do is promise to talk to you before I do anything profoundly unwise. Does that suffice?”