Surprise? [Silas]

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Stasia
"A Crown of Swords"
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Joined: July 18th, 2014, 3:23 am
PC: Illyria Malkom
SC: Muireen do Morny a'Lordeine
Location: Two Rivers, Georgia

Surprise? [Silas]

Post by Stasia » October 31st, 2014, 2:45 pm

Illyria Malkom Illyria grimaced.

For a moment, anyway, before she found her body wracked by the same repulsive heaving sensation; she couldn't breathe, as her diaphragm was currently uninterested in aiding her, and her stomach was busy emptying itself. Everything contracted painfully, all at once, and she hung awkwardly over the wash basin, thankful that it had been cemented to the wall. Her knees shook despite the fact that she had done her best to lock them, and she had the vague feeling that if she did not expel the contents of her stomach soon, she would be on the floor. And when her stomach finally did expunge itself of her dinner and what felt like everything she had eaten in her life, Illyria could only feel grateful.

She breathed, finally, after retching and coughing, and hoped that that was the last of it. That'll be three times now, she thought wearily, dampening a washcloth with a quick weave of Water and wiping her mouth, still clutching to the thought that this could merely be food poisoning in spite of her disappearing and reappearing symptoms. She was lucky her husband trained in the Yards early, or he would have forced her to see a Yellow, and forced her to confirm her suspicions. I've barely missed a cycle, she thought weakly, attempting to reassure herself, And Celene gave me that plant, which I've used every time.

Granted, there had been that one morning, where she had not had the opportunity to take the seeds immediately upon rising, because Silas had had other ideas... She paled to consider the path which she was speedily descending, but had not yet shared her concern with her husband nor a Healer. It had only been a few days since her missed cycle, and the vomiting, though persistent, was fairly new as well. She could afford to wait. She stared at her reflection in the mirror, considering her features, and betrayed herself momentarily by wondering if she would make a good mother.

The Aes Sedai knew that it was not a weight that she was ready to bear. She trembled, her grey eyes wide with fear, and considered, if but for a moment, that she could simply go the Yellows and request a tea, and it would be as if it never happened. It was terribly tempting. But, the petite woman steeled herself - she could not bring the destructive force of mensuration on without discussing it with Silas; if she was pregnant, it was as much as his child as it was hers. She was fearful yet obstinate - she would not act alone, nor would she act selfishly.

Before she could do anything, she would have to gather the courage to tell the truth.

But for now, she let herself ignore the looming possibility of motherhood, and gathered herself for her daily duties. She washed and dressed, ignored her trembling hands and racing heart, and pinned her hair up and off her clammy skin. Silky red tresses were pinned into a simple bun, and she supposed that she needed to be satisfied with the image she projected. She was not quite the fierce lioness that the office required, but Amora had placed her faith in her, and that meant that she had no choice in the matter. But truthfully, she enjoyed her occupation.

Her morning was spent with the arrival of a new novice, one who had come because of a debt of toh. Her cadin'sor was taken and burned like all the other girl's dresses, and that had put a scowl on her face. Regardless, the child had signed the novice book, and left Illyria to deal with the plight of a child who already displayed exemplary control of the One Power. She made of note of Rhiale of the Three-fold Land, and knew that she would be summoning that girl to the Arches within the fortnight.

She was busy scrawling away at parchment, ordering dress sizes to fit her newest charge when there was a knock at her door. "Enter," she called, not bothering to look up as she heard approaching footsteps. It was not until she saw a very familiar pair of hands settle on her desk that she glanced up, and was greeted with the smiling face of her lover. He grinned down at her, and she offered him a soft smile in return. Worry and fear rose as she recalled the events of the morning, but she squashed it, and refused to be bested by her emotions.

"Can I help you?" she asked warmly, taking his hands in her own, letting herself be comforted by his touch.

Light, I'm such a coward....
Silas Malkom It both amused and disturbed Silas to realize that his wife thought she could hide her hardships from him- they had known each other for many years before they had finally gotten together, and Silas had since trained himself to recognize the various fey moods of his Aes Sedai- whether that be to console or to let be for a time. And this was definitely one of the times that he needed to console and comfort.

He sighed as he made his way to the office where his wife worked. While pleased with her appointment (as she was certainly more than up to the task), he was also somewhat irritated by it, especially now that he had issues of his own to deal with. Running an Ajah required a surprisingly massive amount of effort, not that he ever imagined in a thousand years that such a task would be easy. I still don't understand why they chose me, he thought, confused. Perhaps because he was young? Pliable? He scarce thought Jenna al'Chan would hand him the position just to manipulate him, but it was not outside the realm of possibility, given where he was. He would have to be wary of that in the future.

And then, of course, there were the dreams. He wasn't Dreaming, not in the traditional sense. But his walks through Tel'aran'rhiod had been... distracted, as of late. He felt something beckoning him to his homeland- a presence that seemed dead-set on calling him back. And when he finally had gathered the courage to investigate the beckoning call... well, suffice to say it hadn't been pleasant.

I have to go back. I have to find her. Captain-General or not, I have a duty to my family, first and foremost. Which left the issue of breaking the news to his spouse. Silas was quite certain that Illyria would not be pleased with him if he traipsed off to Amadicia without telling her. He could care less about the rest of the Tower- by virtue of being who he was, they didn't exactly have any say over what he did with his time. It was risky, true- but taking risks was the very reason he had taken up the mantle of Asha'man. This was the very reason he had left.

He finally arrived at the office of the Mistress of Novices, breathing deeply to steel himself. Something had to be done. He knocked gently, not wishing to disturb her any more than he already was about to.

"Enter," came the quiet, formal voice from within. He walked over, setting his hands on the desk in front of his lover, just inside her field of vision. She looked up, giving a soft smile to match his own.

It couldn't quite hide the hurt she so obviously was keeping from him. His heart lurched as she questioned him coyly- he needed to address this issue, before anything else.

"...Yes, actually." He sat down in the chair across from her, suddenly feeling a thousand times heavier than normal. "We need to talk." He sighed, pausing for a few seconds, before continuing.

"Something's been bothering you lately. You've been... sad. Anxious. Constantly uneasy. It's... troubling, to say the least." He took her hands in his, looking deeply into her eyes, trying to convey the love and the trust he had for his Ward, his wife.

"I need you to tell me what's wrong. You can trust me. With anything. You know that, don't you? So... I need to know what troubles you so. Please."
Illyria Malkom "...Yes, actually." Silas stared at her for a moment longer, and she soaked up his presence, attempting to calm herself. It was likely something simple and easily done; it would not at all surprise her if he wished to extend bedroom activities to her workplace, and should that be the case, it would be simple enough to lock the door and lay a few Wards for privacy. But as he settled himself into a chair, the grin slipped from his face, and he said the most ominous phrase that she could imagine pouring from his mouth: "We need to talk." She blanched, the blood draining from her face instantaneously, and she felt her stomach drop. Illyria clutched her quill tightly in a suddenly sweaty palm, and was aware of hot tears gathering in her eyes. Fear and anxiety washed over her - she did not bother with attempting to block it from the bond.

"Yes?" she whispered, not daring to breathe.

"Something's been bothering you lately. You've been... sad. Anxious. Constantly uneasy. It's... troubling, to say the least." He reached for her hands, and she thrust her fingers towards him desperately, keen to feel the security of his touch. Her heart began to beat faster, and she swallowed nervously. By no means did she like keeping secrets from him, but truthfully, she was terrified of the change that it would bring into their lives. A child? By the Light, what would they do with a baby? And suddenly, she realized her greatest fear: she should have been far more careful with the contraceptive, and far more responsible, and it was nothing short of stupid, woolheaded, and... It would stretch his patience. The honeymoon phase was officially over.

"I need you to tell me what's wrong. You can trust me. With anything. You know that, don't you? So... I need to know what troubles you so. Please." She clutched to his hands in a white knuckled grasp, fearful of what the next moments would bring. Conceivably, her entire world could come crashing down around her and result in the loss of the singular most important thing in her life. Illyria took in a long, shuddering breath, blinked away at the tears that burned her eyes, and for a long moment, waited in the silence.

"Silas, I..." she paused, swallowed, and gathered what little strength she had. "I'm frightened," she whispered, and she felt concern and alarm flow freely through their bond. "I may be carrying a child."
Silas Malkom Silas sat, dumbstruck, for a few moments, as his mind attempted to process what he had just heard. A... child? She may be with... child? He felt strangely... empty, for having heard such massive news. It was curious. Perhaps he was simply feeling so many emotions that he couldn't properly express any of them? He struggled to focus, trying to find the one thing he felt above everything else. He felt... happy. He was happy about this. Odd, but not unwelcome.

He took a few minutes to compose himself, trying to hold on to that joy. She may be carrying my child... I'm... going to be a father. Another ripple of emotions tore through him, stronger than before. He was nervous, yes. Scared, apprehensive, unsure. Maybe he was even worried. But he felt happy, more than anything else. He nodded inwardly at this revelation. I am happy.

His hands tightened around his wife's hands- not painfully, but reassuringly. Strongly. Protectively. He smiled, finally expressing the joy he felt to his terrified Ward. "Is... is that all...? Light, Illyria, the way you've been going on, one might have thought you'd killed someone!" He rose, bringing her up to stand with him, and circling around her desk to embrace her.

"This is a good thing, Illyria. This... this is what I wanted, when I chose to marry you. A family- a life built with you, around you. This is all just... part of the plan. Maybe a little sooner than we'd anticipated, but... I'm happy about this. I want this, but... only if you do, too." He raised her face up to his, looking in her eyes. "I don't want you to be scared about this. If we're going to do it, I want you to be happy about it too."

[OOC: I'll reply ASAP - trying to wrap up a few things on my end and scarf kitten is not easy to deter. =P]
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